Schlechtes Deutsch

I don’t think I’ve written about my German progress for a while.

And that is because, I don’t really think I’m progressing.

I am taking a total of 8 hours of classes per week, and it is helping me, but the progress is slowwwwwwwwwwww movinnnggggggg.

My problem is that I don’t understand the very complicated grammar, and I know that means I need to sit myself down and finally learn it, but…

This publishing project is also taking up most of my time. I know making excuses is totally lame, but I’m totally going to do it anyway!

When I signed up for German class, I had just finished ALL my coursework, and was about to start my thesis. But I wanted to take a break so I could relax and focus solely on German.

Not that learning German is totally relaxing (!), but it is not as high pressure as grad school is. Plus learning German is more fun (and funny!).

So now I am really focussed on getting my work published in English, and trying to learn German at the same time when I have to function so highly (let’s say, haha!) in English, is tough for me. I am like the opposite of a language genius, and probably have negative language learning skills. Unfortunately.

Darum, ist mein Deutsch schon schlecht!

It also doesn’t help that my HOT German tutor is in France right now and will be there for the rest of the week. I need help with my German homework, due tomorrow morning. I have to write 10 complicated sentences, and I guess it would help if they made sense too.

Schade.

Trying not to be too stressed out

Things have been intense here with school.  I’m getting ready to submit my papers for publication, and it is a lot of work, not to mention a huge emotional rollercoaster.

I need to not take things so hard, but I keep getting caught up and stressing myself out unnecessarily. I knew being a grad student would be tough, especially for a non-academic-y person like me. But I didn’t think I would get this far either, which is why I am putting so much pressure on myself.

I will keep you posted on whether my work gets published or not. Fingers crossed.

On a more fun note, I started my new German classes in Düsseldorf and I love it. The thing is, I don’t think I’m going to learn much German, because almost everyone in the class speaks English fluently. We all speak in English before/during/after class.

It’s like Chinese school all over again!

When I was learning German here in Duisburg, no one else in my class could speak English. Some people said they could, but really they couldn’t. So we would converse only in German together, and even now we talk on the phone and hang out and speak only in German. It’s nuts, but it happens.

But in Düsseldorf, during the break of my first German class, I immediately went up to a girl and started with the German. She reminded me so much of someone I know and I am chatty so I wanted to tell her all about it in broken Deutsch. lol. She looked at me startled, asked me (in German) whether I wanted to go out for coffee with her, and we left the class.

That’s when the English broke out and she told me I scared her by speaking to her in German. She said no one else in the class does that and that she found it to be intense.

I am intense in grad school and in German class. Who knew!!

Expat Meme Part II

This meme was originally published by a Touch of Dutch here.

Long answers ahead…

What activities or routines do you participate in now, on a daily or regular basis, which you had never done before in your home country?

Commuting. Cooking. Language learning.

I used to live/work/play/study in one big city (Toronto), and never had to use regional transit. I now live 75km away from school and need to time my life well.

I also cook now! Martin and I made 2 curries (1 tandoori, 1 madras) and some parathas for dinner today. I also learned to cook Chinese food, because I crave it all the time. I can’t easily go out to eat Indian or Chinese food here, and if I don’t cook it myself, I would always be eating bread. So there’s no other option. I need to cook! As a result, my cooking skills have improved by a lot.

German classes to the tune of 13 hours per week is another big change. No one in my class really speaks English either.  When I took German classes in Toronto, it was  2 hours per week and we ALL spoke English to each other. The little German we did speak was littered with English adjectives, or merely English sentences translated word for word in German. Ooh. I can’t do that anymore. Not if I want people to understand me! Although I miss my German class buddies from Toronto a lot. *sniff*

If you will be soon or eventually going back to where you came from, do you feel you would be able to reintegrate well, or do you feel there would be difficulty? Please explain why you feel you would or wouldn’t be able to get along fine. And would you choose to return to the place where you came from, or would you rather try a new location in your home country? If so, where?

I’m not planning to go back to Toronto anytime soon, because I’m just too busy here with school and life. But I don’t think my 1 year away will hinder me from reintegrating back into the culture. At least I hope not! The only thing is, my English is suffering. It takes me more time to come up with words and I draw blanks a lot when I’m trying to describe something simple. If I did move back to Canada, I think I would want to settle somewhere out of Toronto. Not because I don’t love Toronto (I do!) but because I’ve spent all this time away, I’d be afraid of Toronto feeling too normal (boring) to me. I’d want the challenge of trying to make it somewhere else. It’d definitely have to be in a big city though. That certainly narrows it down for Canada by a lot!

Will you be living in the country where you are an expat for the rest of your life? For example, after you no longer need to be living abroad, if this is your situation, would you choose to remain in your host country? Or would you prefer to go back to where you came from?

Well, I am banking on the ‘rest of my life’ being a long stretch away. So I can’t really say if I’ll be living in Germany for that long. My gut instinct right now is No. While I like it here and would miss it a lot if I had to leave (I know because I’ve already left once!), I can’t shake that Canada feels more like home. At least in Toronto, my Mom is there and I love how it’s so diverse. So yes, I think I would prefer to go back to ‘where I came from’. But the more I get integrated into German culture, the more I’ll love it and be more comfortable here.

Name at least one thing you had assumed/stereotyped about the culture and/or lifestyle of the citizens before you came to the country abroad where you are living? And if you were to now explain how you feel about these same assumption, would you say your assumption was correct? Or do you feel differently, after witnessing for yourself? Feel free to explain what you now think or how you now feel about this.

The only thing I really thought about was that Germans eat a lot of meat. When I came here, I noticed it to be true. I guess I also thought that society here would be less sexist with gender issues, since they have a female Chancellor. But I actually find it to be more sexist here on an everyday level, which seems to be socially accepted.

Do you have experience living in other foreign countries beside the host country where you live currently? 

No. I did spend most of 2009 here in Germany, but it feels like it doesn’t count because I wasn’t really doing the same thing or had the same intentions. When people ask me, I tell them I’ve been here for 1 year since I moved here [for the second time] in September 2010.

What leads you to be abroad? Is it due to love, or do you have completely different circumstances?

Love and grad school. I came here to study so that I could be part of a network and do something productive, whilst being near Martin again. This was a good choice. Grad school currently is riding on my nerves, and can be an incredible amount of pressure. But being with Martin is so wonderful! He is really cute and sweet and it beats being across the Atlantic from each other.

Do you find yourself surprised by how things have changed while you were away?

No. I haven’t been away for that long, but I do get surprised at how things haven’t changed since I left. Maybe because I feel like I am changing so much, doing so much, experiencing so much at a rapid rate, while in comparison, things have stayed the same in Toronto.

Do you feel you have more knowledge and/or experience in, for example, worldly issues/topics?

I definitely feel I have more cultural understanding than I did before I moved abroad. I also understand first hand what it’s like for immigrants in a new country. Of course, I feel a little more well rounded with my opinions regarding environmental science and international relations, since that is what I study. For example, if you want to talk to me about the UN, I now understand more of what they do (or don’t do) compared to before when I had little to no opinion.

Do you feel personally or more culturally enriched by your experience[s] living abroad?

I feel both personally and culturally enriched by being here. I feel a deep sense of personal enrichment because I’ve always wanted to live abroad and learn another language, and that is exactly what I’m doing now.

While I feel so culturally enriched that I wish I didn’t feel so culturally enriched. I’m still at that point in my expat life where things are frustrating. I’m over the honey moon and novelty stage and really need to buckle down and learn. So a little less cultural enrichment couldn’t hurt.

German in 6 months

I have given up with my upcoming German test in December. It’s just too soon and too stressful, and I don’t have much time with it since I NEED lots of time here to ‘relax’ and also have my pre-thesis work to do.

My German test consists of 2 days. The first day is listening, reading, writing. The second day is speaking. You can get 100% on the written test but if you fail the speaking portion, you won’t get the certificate.

I don’t feel ready yet. Plus it costs 80-100EUR to take. AND I want to repeat this level next semester anyway, since I missed the first 3 weeks and heard that my level and the next level are FARRRR apart. They even have bridge courses between my level and the next. Given my learning capacity and progress in my current level, I don’t think I’m ready for the next level.

It’s so hard speaking German!!!!! I can do all the homework fine but speaking it (nicely) is another story.

I have a friend here who speaks fluent German. He learned it in 6 months!! He even has a Master’s degree that was taught in German. Martin confirms that his German is ‘perfect’. My friend attributes it to taking intensive German classes while having a German girlfriend, and encourages me to speak German to Martin.

Already it’s been 2 months for me in intensive German classes. I don’t think I’ll be where my friend is in 4 measly months. *sigh*

Making friends in German

I have a new friend who is coming over in an hour or so and we will be studying German together. Apparently he has some old tests that we’re going to look over.

He is really nice and we met in German class. He doesn’t speak much English so whenever we talk, it is entirely in German. Which is so crazy! He called me last night when I was out with my girlfriend, and her and I were both amazed that I was suddenly speaking German. I only really speak it when I am forced to. kekeke.

Another gf in my German class called me (also speaks no English) when I was out with Martin, and he too was amazed that I spoke only in German to her. He is used to me speaking at most, half-German to my friends, if at all. This gf and I are planning a dinner double date with her and her German husband and me and my German bf! That will be another fun German-speaking party.

It’s crazy to me that I talk and text people in German, and that I can communicate nicely with them even without English as my crutch. I’m still not super confident with the language yet, but I guess I’m good enough with it to make some friends!

One thing at a time…

My new German class is going so well. Not because I’m a top student or anything (I’m probably still the worst in the class – no joke!) but I can actually follow what goes on and that is a huge deal to me.

I’m not used to following German, and will admit that I tune it out a lot in my everyday life. But in class, I understand what my teacher and classmates are saying. It’s so strange to be able to understand things again.

When you live in a foreign country where you don’t know the dominant language, and the language itself is totally new to you, you kind of get used to not knowing what’s going on. You walk around in a cloud of confusion. As a tourist, this is a lot of fun. You don’t need to know or care about much. But living your everyday life like this can be stressful and tiring. So I’m glad I’m finally ‘getting it’.

I have to tell myself: one thing at a time. This doesn’t fit my personality, but is all I have the capacity to do right now. I am focussing most of my time and energy on learning German.

I also have my thesis to do, but right now I’m still at the beginning stages (i.e: I haven’t even thought of it yet!). When the time comes, I’ll switch gears and focus on that.

It’s hard to just do one thing though. All my friends are working on exciting internships at UN and WHO. I can also do this if I want (and yes I want!), but I know I can’t do both internship + German learning at the same time. Not very well, anyway. So I picked the one that I thought was most sensible for me right now, which just happens to be learning German.

I could be fratenizing in English everyday at the UN, but instead I spend my days in German class and my afternoons doing homework. Am I nuts?!

I just wrote Martin an email, and decided to not write at my whim but to figure it out and write something that I know is grammatically correct. That resulted in me consulting 2 books to write a 6 word sentence. I hope I even got it right for all that effort!

In German, you have to conjugate not only verbs, but also nouns and adjectives. Adjectives! You know, description words like: ‘pretty’ & ‘big’ & ‘nice’ (don’t ask me what the email is about! ). Those not only depend on the 3 genders in German, but also the way the sentence is formed. *sigh* Headache time!

This is what I’ve been occupying myself with as a brand spanking new 30 year old! I’m thrilled though, and very grateful for the opportunity. Best way to start off my 30′s.

Fast fließend Zwei

Just wanted to document that I’ve switched my German class to a lower level.

I gave the higher level a try for 2 weeks, and even though I still learned something from every class, I found it too advanced for me. It was frustrating because while everyone was discussing different grammar rules for a particular verb (in German), I didn’t even know what the verb meant! I realized that my grammar has major holes in it – holes that I would like to fill.

The lady who first interviewed me asked me to speak some more so she could hear. She asked me to describe what I did over the weekend and what I did yesterday. I did and she said she thought my German was pretty good already, and that I speak clearly. But she understood why I wanted to switch and found another class for me.

Now, instead of meeting 2 nights a week like I was before, I’ll be learning German 4 days a week!!! It’s in the mornings, so hopefully my school schedule doesn’t conflict. I won’t be able to make every class, but I want to give it a try. The class will still be hard for me (intermediate level) but hopefully it won’t be too hard like the last class.

I’ve already missed 3 weeks, and I start tomorrow morning. Eeek! But I have the book and will try to catch up. *Fingers crossed*

 

 

 

Fun with German

Last night I started my first German class of the semester. I’ll be going to German class twice a week (in total 5 hours per week) from now until mid-December at the local community college.

The class was SOOOO hard. But so much fun!

My German is also the worst in the whole class. This is definitely going to be a challenge, but I’m excited to improve.

The class consists of 12 people from all over. Lots of Europeans. No one else is from an English speaking country. That alone should get me to learn the language.

I’m also excited to make friends with people and hang out with them! Did I mention that Martin and I have NO friends here in Duisburg?

I’m already day dreaming about hanging out with them, all of us speaking only German socially. FUN!

Fast fließend

My German interview-test was today, and despite being nervous and crying about it last night (sorry Sweetie), it went well!

The test was to place me in a German class at the community college. I had to have a conversation in German. Nothing crazy, but understanding when other people speak is pretty difficult for me. They have to speak slowly, use easy words, and preferably with a neutral, unemotional tone. If they can repeat themselves 3 times, then even better!

I was afraid my German would suck so much that I’d have to start all over again. But I ended up doing okay. I even got placed at a level higher than what I was aiming for. Apparently I am one level shy of being fluent.

My tester said my German is very good for someone who has taken so few courses. She said she was surprised that I don’t normally speak German in my everyday life (i.e at school or with friends) and that my vocabulary is broad -  but that I still speak slow and my grammar is shaky.

So I’m now enrolled in a semi-intensive course (5 hours/week) from September to December. If I pass a test in December, then I’ll go onto the next level which is for fluent-speakers.

That’s NUTS. I’m SOOOO excited. My big goal is to be fluent in German. I still have a long way to go, but it feels good to be on the right track.